I mean that's gotta be it.

Who knew J's bald head would endear itself so strongly with the world at large? It seems like every time Peter Moore gets interviewed, someone has to ask Where's Poochie J?" And always with the vague answers.

When asked where J Allard was, Moore replied that "he's right across the street there. You know, the Live update, we're enjoying, that's J's team... You know, we should probably start working on the next one. And that'll be J... These things take years to develop. That will be J's responsibility as well. He's busy. Don't worry about J."

I can only imagine some Weekend at Bernie's situation here, with J's body propped up in front of a window across the street with fishing line running from a hook in his hand, across the road, and into a pulley above Moore's head. "Of course J's around! Look, he's right over there! See? Hey J, wave! *yank yank yank* Ha! What a character! And he's not dead!"

Please, if you have any information about J's real whereabouts, contact local authorities immediately.