All the pre-launch crap is finally done, but that just leaves space for... stupid launch stories! Lose your remaining faith in mankind!

• At the Metreon in San Francisco, Sony staged a dramatic arrival for the PS3 to the store... except it was all for show and the boxes were empty.
• Afterwards, reporters mobbed the first PS3 buyer at the store, asking insightful questions like "How do you feel about making history?" Zuh?
• A Kotaku writer personally witnessed an attempted PS3 smash and grab.
• A nine-months pregnant woman tried to ignore her contractions while standing in line.
• Armed thugs attempted to rob people in a line in Connecticut, and shot someone who resisted. Robberies have taken place in several locations.
• Former senator John Edwards admits that a staff member tried to use his name to secure a PS3 after he had mentioned wanting one for his family. The kicker is that the staffer went to Wal-Mart, which Edwards has lambasted on several occassions for poor employee treatment.
• A crowd in California rushed a Best Buy after being told there were only 35 PS3s available. The store closed up, the police on-hand determined the crowd was an "unlawful gathering", and out came the batons. Hell yeah.
• A girl in Austin lined up for the hell of it, saying she's not into gaming at all but "she heard that it was going to be good." The reporter feels the need to one-up her retardation by responding "You are a girl. Us girls, we don't really fit into this kind of environment with all the gaming." If they haven't annoyed you enough by that point, watch them complain about freezing in 65 degree weather.
• Possibly the stupidest story of them all, a Wisconsin Wal-Mart had 50 people in line for the PS3 when they announced they only had 10 systems. The assistant manager then got the brilliant idea to line up ten chairs and have the group race to be one of the 10 to get a seat. The resulting mad rush led one man to run headlong in to a pole. Update: Now with video!