A note to Joystiq and Kotaku: I must insist that you cease in this attempt to render my summary of you last year obsolete. Joystiq has been surprisingly reasonable as of late, while Kotaku has persisted in a series of posts about a woman in Japan who shows her butt. I looked past the Idolm@ster posts because at least that was a video game; this, on the other hand, is embarrassingly retarded. If you're that desperate for hits, you could take the GamesRadar route and cook up labored top 10 lists -- at least that would be sticking to the theme. Or, you could demonstrate a modicum of integrity. Y'know, whichever.

A note to Destructoid: You are still terrible.

Industry and multi-console news

• Midnight Club: Los Angeles is coming to the 360 and PS3 on September 9, along with Midnight Club: LA Remix on the PSP.
• The trademark dispute between broadcaster ABC and TimeGate Studios has been resolved. ABC has agreed not to use the name Section 8 for an upcoming sci-fi TV show, as it's already the name of an in-development TimeGate FPS.
• The ESRB and PTA are partnering for a new campaign to raise parental awareness of game ratings.
• Realtime Worlds has bought back the global distribution rights for their upcoming MMO All Points Bulletin.
• The next Silent Hill game has been officially titled Silent Hill: Homecoming and dated for September 2008.
• The Stella Atari 2600 emulator has updated to version 2.5.1.
• EA has revealed the hoops you have to jump through to get the DLC Battlefield: Bad Company weapons.
• Cracked -- yeah, the magazine that's not Mad -- lists 10 highly anticipated games you'll never get to play.
• GTA4 bus ads are being pulled in Chicago after questioning from a local news station. If this seems familiar, it's because there's been similar debate over GTA ads on public transit in the past in Boston, Portland and Denver.
• Bethesda has no plans for a Fallout 3 demo. "When you build it as one thing, there's no way to portion off a section and have it stand on its own without putting the whole game in the demo, which we're just not going to do."
• CVG has an interview with Ed Boon about Mortal Kombat vs. DC. He mentions there were times in the past when they would "get really close" to agreeing on an MK vs. Street Fighter game, but it never panned out.

PC and mobile news

New content: Commander: Europe at War demo,

• System specs have been announced for Age of Conan.
• Blizzard has denied Uwe Boll's request to direct a film version of World of Warcraft.
• NCSoft says they have no plans to implement their micro-transaction NCcoin system in Guild Wars.
• In light of the article on Infocom's Milliways at Waxy.org linked last night, Simon Wistow takes issue with the way it was handled. Specifically, the lack of any attempt to get in contact with the people who wrote the internal e-mails that were now being excerpted for all to see. "I know that's the thing you do - you check your sources. You get corroboration and comment. For a start that just plain polite - you know, the sort of thing a decent human being does."

Nintendo news

New Virtual Console titles: River City Ransom, Phantasy Star III Generations of Doom

• The president of Epic is not a fan of the Wii. "I haven't played anything that I really wished hadn't been on another platform sadly enough."
• Video Gamer has two videos comparing Mario Kart 64 and Double Dash tracks to what they look like in Mario Kart Wii.
• Solid Snake makes an appearance as a playable character in New International Track & Field on the DS.
• Miyamoto isn't sure of the role family will play in the success of Wii Fit in America, as American families are split up more often than in Japan. I was going to say something about Japanese nuclear families, but then it just felt weird.
• The New York Times looks at the big but stingy audience for the Wii. "These new gamers are content with the games they have, often going no further than the Wii Sports game that comes with the machine. They don’t buy new games with the fervor of a traditional gamer who is constantly seeking new stimulation."
• For the anniversary of Mother 3's release in Japan, the Mother 3 fan translation project has released a video showing their progress.

Sony news

• Konami has postponed the Metal Gear Online beta while they sort out server issues. The new start date is tentatively set for April 25. This is going swimmingly so far!
• Edge has a preview of Metal Gear Solid 4 from this weird mountain getaway press playthrough Konami put together.
• The LA Times reports that a PS3 video service could be available by summer.
• Sony is targeting the Indian market with a PS2 game featuring Hanuman, a figure in Indian mythology. "We have chosen the Hanuman game as our first title specifically developed for the Indian market as the theme is an ever-popular one across the country."
• There's a rumor that an alternate reality game for Resistance 2 is in the works.
• There are also rumors that the PS3 will break even in August, and that Sony will offer a slimline PS3 in fall. This rumor comes by way of analysts, which means it's guaranteed to be wrong.
• Gran Turismo creator Kazunori Yamauchi lists what cars he personally drives. "In terms of body design, I think the Ford GT is the best in the history of automobiles."
• Amazon's deal of the day is Eye of Judgment for $42.99.

Microsoft news

New Xbox Originals: Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory, Metal Arms

• This week's Live Arcade game will be Lost Cities.
• GameSpy has Gears of War 2 details from Comic Con.
• Instructables teaches you how to get on Xbox Live with dial-up. First step is to jump off a bridge.
• Amazon has Sega Rally Revo for $23.10.